I always want to “fit in”. Like everyone. We’re all social animals, “humans” or “elves” or even “wolves” (and foxes). The cats maybe aren’t. I can’t tell. I’m not a cat. I just love them.

But I never do. I’m always clashing with this or that group. Never on purpose; never to be “special”; it just happens.

Say, I am a lot of a feminist. But apparently not a “real” one because – again – I am not “fat-positive”. I am pro-fitness. Neither do I believe in the crappy adage of “all people are beautiful” – nope. For one – here’s an exception: I’m definitely not beautiful on the inside because I am thinking all these things and even saying all these things out loud; and while I am not exactly ugly physically, I am not a “beauty” either. I do my best to look good because I think it’s part of respect towards others. That’s that. I will always use concealer to cover up my stupid couperose (diffuse redness and spider veins) and acne (yes I am thirty, but adult acne is a thing; and don’t think I haven’t invested into treatment… I am forever on meds, but some cases are just bad), same as I will use deodorant. Which I wish more Russians would do, BTW. Deodorant is apparently considered a luxury item here.

There are a lot of ugly people in the world. And that’s okay. Deal with it. Live with it. Where’s the ugly pride movement?!

Okay *cynicism alert*, maybe fat-positive feminists _are_ the ugly pride movement. Sorry. I’m bad like that.

I have fat friends. I am okay with them looking the way they want. I know it’s not easy to lose weight for a lot of people (I struggled myself). But I don’t want anyone to discourage promotion of fitness and sports simply because it offends the fat-positives. It’s just wrong to send the “hey, you’re overweight and that´s okay, don´t do anything” message. Being fit carries way fewer health risks than being obese.

Why the rant:

Apparently someone protested over this ad campaign because it promotes “negative body image” or something. Hell. This model may not be as ripped as I’d like all models to be, and her hips are too femininely wide to comply with my personal idea of “beauty”, but she IS physically fit.

You want “negative body image” – come to Russia where most females just starve but never exercise, since the slightest muscle definition is viewed as “masculine” here, and it’s the worst slur a Russian female can hear, “You look like a man”. And I have witnessed horrible cases of female fitness models and athletes who post their photos online being subjected to damn witch hunts here. Especially if they have short hair. Unfeminine! Burn the witch! This is, like, I can’t find the words to describe how wrong that is.

My own hair’s on the longer side, but that’s not for reasons of “looking feminine”. It’s just because it’s way more manageable that way. Yes. I told you, I’m that “different” it hurts.
Hurts to laugh. Cuz I’m laughing.
If somewhat bitterly.


14 thoughts on “ridiculous

  1. While I don’t consider myself a social animal, I don’t disagree that people are.

    I don’t express a lot of my opinions to just anyone because I don’t believe that I hold what would be considered popular points of view. Holding such points of view tends to make it hard to fit in. For example; I don’t subscribe to the belief that life is precious. Don’t get me wrong. I understand why people think that. But, to my mind, there’s enough evidence to the contrary for me to believe it just isn’t the case.

    In the days of Peter Paul Rubens, the female models were generally, larger. They felt at the time that such a body conveyed that they were healthy, and they probably were. The women in his paintings also tend to have a musculature to them, though they are by no means ‘ripped’. The thing is, times change, and a large woman from Rubens time was most likely not living a largely sedentary life. Being overweight at the time would probably also have been limited to people who could afford to be. Again… times change.

    My body image is one of frustration, despair, resignation and confusion all inextricably woven together. It is what it is, and that won’t change without significant amounts of money. Running my ass around the block on a daily basis just isn’t going to cut it. Though it wouldn’t hurt from a longevity standpoint. I’m also not certain what kind of exercise I should do. I’d like to achieve some muscle tone, but must admit that I’m rather conflicted on whether that’s a good idea. Additionally, I did try to do basic exercise on a daily basis a few months ago. I quickly discovered that my cat thought it was an invitation to play. Press-ups are made much harder when something keeps waving its anus near your face.

    As regards the ad campaign being protested. Some people really need to find a better hobby. Still, people seem ridiculously sensitive these days. The goal of so much recent protesting seems to be that we should all be accepting of others (ha!), and take steps towards living in some sort of harmony. Unfortunately, it’s quite often done in such a manner that it comes across as, “we’re all going to live in a utopia whether you like it or not!” Which is the thing about a utopia. Most people have their own idea of what it would be.

    Oh, and I adore women with muscles. Anyone who’s looked at my gallery would know that though.

    1. Re:opinions – same here. When talking to “normal” people, I got called a “fascist” more times than I care to count. And I was just describing my idea of a utopia (which involves people using their logic facilities more often and being critical of “traditions”, “trends”, “authorities” and the like).
      To me, the “life is precious” thing mostly applies to the lives of those who are weaker than us, which is most animals (since we’ve got guns and the like) and plants. But human life… not that I advocate killing each other (again, most people only murder those who are weaker, and it’s against my “code of honour”), but I definitely don’t find human procreation that wonderful a thing because I don’t buy into the “gift of life” thing – human life isn’t much of a gift. You want to breed happiness, then breed pets. They will be perfectly sheltered and will never know trouble as long as you are alive. Not the case with human children.
      You’re right, most likely only the “top” classes could afford to eat enough to sustain the “plus size”. And the much-lauded (here) “traditional” peasant lifestyle involved extreme physical exertion for everyone starting at quite a young age. Here we still have a number of “traditional” communities, very patriarchal, but with the amount of work those women do, they are physically strong, which always surprises those female reporters who write up on those communities. It’s impossible to find out how exactly those “traditional” women look underneath their clothing, of course =)
      LOL about the cat =) To tell the truth, I personally think that push-ups are less efficient than planks. Being static, planks put less stress on joints and focus on the actual core muscle stability… and probably the cat won’t get that excited either.
      But for dynamic strength pull-ups are the best, of course. If you can buy a simple bar like this (sorry I have no idea what the British name for it is, hence the link goes to a Russian shop) –
      – it’s a great thing to have at home or even at work.
      The “negative rep” trick is very cool. https://www.girlsgonestrong.com/blog/strength-training/how-to-do-a-pull-up-everything-you-need-to-know/

  2. Re: your first paragraph. I was thinking about the fact that as a human being, I’m a social creature by nature and I kind of resent that.

    With the exception of a very small amount of people, I don’t like humanity and would rather not have anything to do with anybody. I know it’s cynical and maybe immature, but it’s how I feel I spend the vast majority of my time alone and prefer it that way, but I still find myself “needing” social contact.

    And no, I’m not some antisocial nutcase who is going to be doing weird shit, ’cause I just want to be left alone.

    PS. you’re pretty okay. :-)

            1. Ooh dat escapist and misanthropic story of yours, in which evil dark elves hellbent on destroying the human civilisation are “pretty okay” =D
              The darkness isn’t either “pretty” or “okay”, y’know. It’s just… eternal.

  3. Well, guess I’d be screwed if I went to Russia. I’m not as thin as I was ten years ago, but I’ve got nicely defined muscles, due to being active at my job all day and lifting dogs of all sizes. But I’ve got long hair, so maybe that’d pass for feminine! :D And just for the record, people that just sit around and get fatter bug me. They’re asking to have tons of health problems. In fact, any size person who just sits around bugs me. Get up and go for a walk or something!

    1. Make sure you don’t let anyone see you lifting those dogs! =) Females are considered the ‘weaker sex’ here.
      Exactly my point. Every summer I see those skin-n-bones around proudly parading their ‘slender silhouettes’… while that skin is damn _sagging_ from lack of being fit. Hell, if only female bodies could develop that ‘muscle bulk’ as easily as it’s believed here!

  4. I wish i wasn’t stuck on my mobile phone for the next few days. I would love to write an extensive response to this but it is not practical at the rate i tap away. So i will be brief. I don’t fit in either for various reasons that, like you, boil down to the fact i won’t compromise who i am in order to fit in. Good! More of us should do that and at least the people who like us like the real us. ☺

      1. And maybe that’s why certain folks at certain other places are so damn annoying…it’s the sheep.

        Humans are supposed to be the top…top predator, top everything. It’s about time that we start going back to being a collection of individuals, as opposed to a herd of flippin’ sheep!

        That’s all those idiots are…’negative body image’…that tells me the whole thing was started by some fat twitter-twit who is too damn lazy to get off her fat ass and walk down the street. So she whines about it to the other twitter sheeple…

        It’s pretty damn sad when a zombie apocalypse would greatly improve things.

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